Widower is a model
for all Champs -The Sands of Time
“GOOD SATURDAY EVENING, TOM” was the subject line of an email I
received this past Saturday night.
The email read, “A widow who has been networked to me via my
grief counselor wanted to read my poem The
Sands of Time on your web site. She just called me to tell me it was not available. Has the
poem been deleted?”
The email was signed, “Dave Southworth.”
Dave has been a Champ before Champs were called Champs. I have
known him via email—we have never met in person--since 2002. At the time he was
about 67. After he had been widowed, he wrote a poem called The
Sands of Time, which he shared with me. I was so moved by the poem I
asked if he’d like it posted to my FindingLoveafter50.com website. He said yes; it’s
been viewed thousands of times since then.
Dave and I shared an added bond: he lives in Clare, Michigan,
and I grew up in Jackson, Michigan.
On Sunday, I wrote back to Dave: “Here is what is going on with the
Finding Love After 50 website. Four
years ago, my website designer bailed on me and refused to give me the
passwords so I could no longer edit the site—couldn’t add to it or delete from
it or update the site’s links. The site went from being the top-searched site
for the keywords Finding Love After 50 on Google to falling to Google’s page
two. I held on to the site because the domain name is worth a lot. Because I
could no longer edit the site may be why your poem page likely disappeared.
“Three weeks ago, I asked Alex, my new web guy to completely
rebuild the Finding Love After 50 site, which is what he is doing. Your poem
will be included. He may have removed the pages for the time being. I would
never allow a poem as touching as The Sands of Time to slip through
the cracks.”
Dave responded:
“Since you posted my poem in December, 2002, I have referred numerous women and
men who are widowed and experiencing barriers in their journey to healing to
your website. It has been 14 years since we were first connected through Phoebe
Oshriak, who remains a close friend.”
During
those 14 years, several widows and widowers have told me how helpful Dave has
been to them in their journey through their grief. He’s got a warm heart and a
gentle spirit.
This past
Monday morning, I checked for the poem on Finding Love After 50. It was still
there! I was quite excited and wrote Dave.
“Found
the poem, here is the link:
I asked Dave, who is now 81, how
he is doing, and asked for his permission to write about him in the newsletter.
Dave
replied, “It would be an honor to appear in your weekly
newsletter.
I was
remembering several years ago when you asked me to write a newsletter article describing
numerous interesting, actually hilarious dates with ladies from a dating
site...and the rush of emails I received.
I
use the word honor because 14 years ago I lost the love of my life;
10
years ago I beat prostate cancer and am cancer free; a year and a half ago, I beat diabetes; one year ago this month,
I won a battle with a heart attack, a heart attack that should have taken my
life.
“Yet
here I am today, disgustingly healthy, with my six-month nuclear stress test
results being that of a 55-year-old man. What
saved my life was I am blessed with a very strong heart muscle (Dave mentioned
that he does 160 push-ups each day as a part of his exercise routine).
“I still live at my lake home with my kitty Miss Annie. I
have several lady friends. However, I have not been blessed with a special
lady.
“I restarted
two books, am still writing poetry, periodic client work squeezed in between early
morning kayaking with the loons singing their morning song, fly fishing, 5
children, 11 grandchildren, 9 great grandchildren. Yes, life is really
good, Tom.
“God
is not through with me yet. It is an honor for me to be what
HE
wants me to be, all I can be. In one way or another, we are all models of life living.
Dave’s email: mcg@provide.net.
Part 2 – Two websites
By
the way, I began a new site a couple of years ago so I could add new
material. That is, Finding Love After 60,
which is advancing nicely in the Google rankings. Yes, it’s all a little
confusing, having two websites similar in name. The Finding Love after 50 site
should have a bright new look to it within a month or so. The sites will
contain different content and I will keep you posted.
For the time being, most of our newsletters are posted on the
blog of the Finding Love After 60 website. There is a wealth of information on
this site.
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